QUALCOSA 01

QUALCOSA CHE NON C’È

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One of the many gifts that I keep from my time living in Italy is the fortune of discovering the music of Elisa Toffoli. With her music, it often happens that upon hearing one of her songs, it seems like it was written in response to something I'm experiencing at that particular moment. Has something similar ever happened to you?

The song that I would like to share with you today is called “Qualcosa che non c’è” – “Something that Doesn’t Exist.” Its message came to me as a gift from heaven, as a response and helping hand in a profoundly cathartic moment in my life. It was one of the most significant turning points for me.  A turning point when you deeply question if everything that is happening in your life is exactly what you had planned – questioning if it makes you truly happy.

Since I was a child I was always drawn to everything pertaining to creativity, art and beauty. Being born in the city of Monterrey, Mexico, at a time when fashion could only be seen in movies, TV shows or fashion magazines, it seemed utopian to me to even imagine that one day I could be part of that industry.

Over time, the world became globalized and access to information and imported products in my country became more accessible. I ended up studying architecture, but the fascination with fashion only grew stronger. A few years after graduating, I quit my job and ventured out in search of fulfilling my dreams. I started by moving to Milan, Italy.

One by one my dreams and expectations, with which I left my country, were consolidated together. However, after a few years, I ran into a deep existential crisis, in which I had to admit that despite all my achievements and living the life that I had imagined for many years, I was not entirely happy.

Tutto questo tempo a chiedermi
Cos’è che non mi lascia in pace
Tutti questi anni a chiedermi
Se vado veramente bene, così
Come sono, così

All this thime wondering
What is it that does not let me be in peace
All these years questioning myself
If I am really doing OK, like this
Being who I am, like this

The song begins with this verse, in which one wonders if you are okay being the person you have become over time. This is something I have done since my childhood, just before my birthday. The dreams one has as a child tend to change over the years, molding themselves into the expectations of the people who are part of your world, in your child’s own perspective. 

In my particular case, I don’t think I had stopped being myself, but I did end up adapting my personality and my dreams, seeking a balance between what I wanted and everything that was expected of me. Mainly, like most children, it was important to me to please my parents and not disappoint them. So the study and life plans in my youth filled me with enthusiasm and joy, yet unconsciously they were still ideas that contemplated in some way, the desire to make other people happy.

Così un giorno
Ho scritto su un quaderno
“Io farò sognare il mondo con la musica”
Non molto tempo dopo
Quando mi bastava fare un salto
Per raggiungere la felicità

So one day
I wrote in a notebook
“I will make the world dream with music”
Not long after
When it was enough for me to jump
To achieve happiness

Do you remember those moments in life when it was easy to desire something and then achieve it? In Elisa’s case, she wanted to make the world dream with music… and she succeeded. I am proof of it. As a child, my dream was to be able to work in the international fashion industry, live in Europe and find love… and over time, I also achieved it. My 3 goals were fulfilled to the letter. This obviously translated into satisfaction and a feeling of happiness. In Italy, I was experiencing the life that seemed distant and impossible in Monterrey, where this was nothing more than plans and dreams.

E la verità è che
Ho aspettato a lungo
Qualcosa che non c’è
Invece di guardare
Il sole sorgere

And the truth is that
I have waited for so long
Somethimg that doesn’t exist
Instead of looking
The sun rise

I was 30 years old when I started to question if I was really happy… and I felt myself collapse when my answer leaned strongly towards a NO. By continuing with that life, the road ahead promised great growth, both in the work aspect and in the personal. The doors kept opening- but my interior was flooded more and more with uncertainty, and a feeling of emptiness, sadness and limitation… as if my life on the outside was not in tune with my true self.

The next verse in the song says not to wait for something that doesn’t exist, but instead to focus on the sunrise. If we could all do this, to which sun would you give your full attention?

Perhaps your first image would be looking at the physical sun, preferably at sunrise or sunset; which could be useful if it helps you to tune in to your true essence. What if we could see in that Sun, our own divinity or that best version of ourselves. We could connect with our true selves and focus all our actions on promoting a full life, doing what truly makes us happy.

Questo è sempre stato un modo
Per fermare il tempo e la velocità
I passi svelti della gente, la disattenzione
Le parole dette senza umiltà
Senza cuore, così
Solo per far rumore

This has always been a way
To stop time and speed
The agile steps of the people, the inattention
Words spoken without humility
Without a heart, just like that
Only to make noise

When we manage to focus our attention on what is really worthwhile, what really exists and is the most important thing, it can be a useful tool for not losing the course of life. It could help us remain aligned with our true intentions and goals in life, valuing each space and time lived, observing consciously… evolving fully… transcending life.

To achieve this, it is essential to avoid at all costs, being distracted by the stress and acceleration of life, by the unbridled momentum of having and possessing, by the need to prove our worth to others or simply to comply with what others expect of you.

E miracolosamente
Non ho smesso di sognare
E miracolosamente
Non riesco a non sperare

And miraculously
I haven’t stopped dreaming
And miraculously
I can’t stop hoping

It is evident that life is not always easy and that in some moments one would like to stop trying. Courage and self-control are required to move forward after failure or disappointment. Life on our planet is not usually easy, so it should be considered a true miracle every time we take the courage to try one more time. Never stop dreaming and waiting for what you want to happen. 

The experience lived in Italy was a long process to digest. The feeling of having failed at something fueled the fear of being wrong again when making a new decision. In search of a solution, each alternative represented a chain effect, which would rearrange the rest of the pieces that made up the puzzle of my life.

Without having everything clear, I decided to take a physical distance from where I was at that moment, to be able to see the entire film from the outside, since immersed in my reality it was very difficult for me to understand the situation. It was a very deep introspection process that allowed me to realize the things that were worth keeping in my life, as well as all those that had to be transformed into something better. The changes occurred gradually and with each one of them came feelings of forgiveness, happiness and gratitude, which were transformed into learning lessons and wisdom to continue walking the path of life.

E se c’è un segreto è
Fare tutto come se
Vedessi solo il sole

Un segreto è
Fare tutto come se
Fare tutto come se
Vedessi solo il sole
Vedessi solo il sole
E non qualcosa che non c’è

And if there is a secret it is
Todo do everything as if
I am only staring at the sun

A secret is
To do everything as if
To do everything as if
You were only looking at the sun
You were only looking at the sun
And not to something that does not exist

Doing everything in life

focused on valuing yourself,

and fulfilling your dreams

should always be your Sun.

May life not pass you by

without realizing

what you are worth

and what you deserve

May your dreams

and desires from your soul

be reflected in fullness

and overflowing joy.

May life fill you with magic,

miracles and blessings

that could exceed by far

all of your expectations.

Let nothing and no one

be an impediment

to your realization

and transformation.

Never stop dreaming,

never stop hoping

and live your life fully

looking at the Sun. 

And about ELISA, ever since I learned of her existence, I have deeply connected with everything she represents as a human being, most of her lyrics reach the heart and connect with the deepest part of your being. Her interpretation is very transcendent and special. It is not surprising that even today, I still consider her one of my favorite artists.

There are many songs I would highly recommend from this amazing artist. Maybe you can start by listening QUALCOSA CHE NON C’È…  I truly hope you will like it as much as I do.

Song: ELISA TOFFOLI | Qualcosa che non c’è lyrics © Sugarmusic S.p.a., Sogno Meccanico Sas Di Toffoli Elisa & C, Sugar Srl

Italian Lyrics: www.musixmatch.com

Images in order of appearance: Tim Marshall, Laurenz Kleinheid, Adrian Swancar, Jaroslav Devia, Shlomi Platzman, Marc olivier, Kevin Schmid, Daniel Mingook, Paul Talbot, Keegan Houser, Ryoji Iwata, Toa Heftiba, Fuu, Alexi Romano, Rhett Wesley, Asap Rocky, Joshua Earle and Nick Moore on www.unsplash.com. 

7 Responses

  1. I truly loved the song and it’s meaning. I watched the YouTube video, and WOW did she speak to my soul! ❤

    1. Infinite thanks for your meaningful message. I am honored and pleased to know you have liked the content, trusting you will continue to do so in the future. What would you be doing in your site?… Looking forward to reading more from you, I wish you all the best… today and everyday!!!
      Best Regards,
      Lalo Tamez
      PD. Is your name Israel?… or are you from Israel?

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